First Red Sox Homestand

WOW. What a crazy past couple of months. Between accepting the 2018 Red Sox photo internship, graduating from Ohio University, moving to Boston, and visiting family in NYC, it has been a whirlwind. So much so that I have forgotten to update this blog. 

In one word, I am BLESSED. I cannot believe the amazing opportunities that OU gave me during my time there. I received an impressive education, and came out of four years with amazing internship opportunities, a trip to the Olympics, and numerous interviews with companies that I never even dreamed would be interested in me. I came away with professional connections I never realized I would get the chance to meet, with friendships that allowed me to grow personally and professionally, and the love of my life who supports my every move. This is a dream come true. 

As soon as I graduated, I moved out to Boston the next day to start my internship with the Red Sox. It wasn't a picture-perfect start. I struggled getting photos I was proud of during my first few home games. It was hard to work my way around the stadium and feel creative. It was challenging to feel like I was actually contributing to the photo staff with the photos I was taking, but I was really just being hard on myself. Once I hit the end of the week and the last two games of the homestand, I felt a lot better. I felt like I was starting to "see" things, no matter where I was in the stadium. I felt like I was starting to find my vision, and that feels good. I can't wait for the next few months to unfold! Here's some photos I liked from this week:

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MAC Swimming Championships

There's more to my job than just taking pictures. As the head photographer, I also manage the schedules of our three other photographers, coordinate press passes, speak with other schools' SIDs, communicate with our facilities people, upkeep equipment and manage our rates. It was more than I originally signed up for freshman year, but it's been a great growing experience. I've had to deal with issues at 10 or 11 at night, I've had to figure out copyright issues, and I've had negotiate fair pay for all of my photographers based on the work that they're doing. Everything that I've mentioned above has happened throughout the past two years, but for some reason... every. single. one. of those things decided to happen last week as well, just as we were all getting ready to shoot one of our largest events this year - the MAC swimming and diving championships.

I was a swimmer growing up, so swimming has always felt very therapeutic to me. I was so stressed last week, trying to coordinate everything and ensure payment, but I knew I just had to get to the pool to shoot something before I got overwhelmed. I decided to head there Thursday and see what panning shots I could get. I struggle with panning, I rarely get something in focus. So I left that night pretty frustrated... I mean, it IS frustrating, right? You head to the pool, all your gear in hand, no real responsibilities other than the one you have to yourself to shoot something you're proud of... and it doesn't happen. That's when I remembered something I've been trying to keep central to my thoughts recently - shoot the kind of pictures that make YOU happy, shoot the kind of photos YOU want. Yeah, I want panning shots, I guess. But do I really like those photos, or am I just doing that because someone somewhere along the line said it might look nice in my portfolio? Probably the latter.

I went to the meet Friday with a new thought process: take good photos, whatever good means to you. And I felt like I did that, I felt like I got some photos I was finally proud of and wanted to share! I feel a lot less stressed now.

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Comparing Yourself

I frequently suffer from that disease that plagues all creatives - the chronic comparing yourself to others. I'm in my final semester of school, and along with that has come a lot of stress. Stressing about jobs, stressing about where bae's gonna be, and stressing about whether I'm good enough at all of this. I hate the up's and down's. I think we all do. I hate when my confidence gets crushed when I see a spectacular photo taken by one of my peers. I hate when I think to myself, "Why didn't I take that photo?" or "Why didn't I think of that?" or "Wow, that person really had the better angle." But something I really love is taking photos, and telling stories, and going to all of the places that photography takes me and meeting all of the people it allows me to meet. And I guess, now that I've thought about it for a while, I'd rather have a career that kicks me in the gut sometimes but allows me to really live, instead of sitting in a cubicle answering phones or crunching numbers all day.

All it took was a little friendly reminder from one of my best photo pals, Calvin. You see things the way you see them, he said. No one can take a photo that's just like your's, and you can't take the same photos that everyone else takes. And I know, deep down, that he's really right. That we can learn from everyone, but the reason we're creatives is because we all have a unique vision. 

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